Have you ever noticed how motherhood often comes with an invisible but palpable receipt of societal norms? From the time that baby bump becomes visible, so do the often unsolicited expectations of what motherhood should look like. Koe hosts an enlightening conversation on her show, "Girls Stop Playin," with two young mompreneurs Mila and Erica of the "Good Mom's Bad Choices" podcast. The discussion aims to debunk motherhood misperceptions and embolden young black mothers to confidently navigate their unique journeys.
Becoming a mother doesn't mean your life stops. Quite the contrary. As Koe, Mila, and Erica point out, motherhood introduces a new chapter - a rebirth of sorts. For Erica, it entailed exploring her identity and merging her newfound motherhood status with her own personal growth. On the other hand, Mila's journey involved integrating her child into her life, emphasizing keeping your identity intact amid the sputtering torrents of toddler tantrums and teenage trials.
Those societal expectations dumped on mothers- remember them? Erica and Mila, our brave mother-warriors, tear them down and recast the model as they weave their narratives. How? Through their podcast, "Good Mom's Bad Choices." Launched in 2018, they initially approached it as a space to share personal experiences and confessions making them relatable, but it escalated into an empowering movement and support mechanism for single black mothers navigating life, love, and parenting.
Their podcast is their platform, their megaphone to the world, through which they challenge conventions, tackle taboos, and provide an unfiltered view into their lives. One such hurdle they jostle is the mixed views toward medicinal marijuana usage. Erica, for instance, takes the step of normalizing her marijuana consumption. Through candid discussions with her daughter, she outlines that it is her medicine and encourages a respectful understanding of its usage.
But how can a conversation about redefining norms be complete without discussing relationships? From recounting experiences with polyamory to the dynamics of threesomes, these ladies bare it all. Their stories are not just about individual preferences and pleasures. They discuss respect, enjoyment, trust, and the paramount importance of setting boundaries. Above all, they remind us that life is more than a one-size-fits-all monogamy or even polyamory. Their narratives focus on the freedom of choice and exploration of personal comfort zones.
Comfort zones extend beyond personal relationships. Raising a child is a journey best traveled with a supportive community. Traditional societies have a proverb about how 'it takes a village to raise a child.' Our trio of powerful women propose the idea of forming living arrangements or communes for mothers as a solution to single parenting challenges. Afterall, a warm, supportive environment encompasses more than just providing care. It's about camaraderie, shared experiences, and collective growth.
The conversation ends on a high note of empowerment, as they passionately discuss goal-setting for women. Whether it involves starting a dream venture, pursuing a hidden passion, or merely aspiring to thrive amid strife, the first rule they firmly establish is "don't wait." Don't wait for the perfect moment. Don't wait for friends or approval. Just start!
Being a mother doesn't mean yielding to societal expectations. Erica and Mila's life stories are not just about making choices - good, bad, and controversial. It's about owning up to them. So, fellow millennial black moms, remember - you get to rewrite your narrative and be the role model your daughter aspires to.
In the end, the most meaningful message that resonates from the podcast is simple yet profound. Being a 'good' mom means being authentically you — an empowered, bold, and unapologetic one!
So challenge convention. Navigate your path. Take action. Be Real. Be you. Be a Good Mom making brave choices.
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